Sunday, October 3, 2010

A 5 Year Olds Views on Marriage and Death

Aiden has been on this kick lately about wanting to marry me. We keep trying to explain that he can't marry his mommy, I'm already married to daddy, and so on.

Cuddling in bed at bedtime tonight, the conversation started again. He asks me who he is going to marry and I say we have no way of knowing. It could be someone he works with, or someone he meets in college, or a friend of a friend. He then asks when he gets married, how long will he be married. I tell him that when we get married, it's supposed to be forever. To which he replies, "You mean until it's dark out?" Mmmm, not quite getting that concept. He also tells me he can't be a grown up because he doesn't know how to cook anything except peanut butter and jelly. I reassure him that there are guys out there with that same problem but I will make sure he knows how to cook.

Then I make the mistake of trying to explain the idea of forever by saying that when we get married, we should be together until we die. Death is not an easy topic for a 5 year old. Why, oh why, did I go there? He starts getting upset about me or Todd dying and I told him that hopefully me and daddy live a long life and don't die until we are really old. He starts crying and cuddles closer to me and when I asked him what was wrong he says "But you're almost really old!" I felt bad to see him so sad but I laughed out loud at that one. Yes, a real LOL! Then we went through a million scenarios about who dies first and this and that. Oh. My. God. That was painful.

I get him tucked in and come out to blog about this little conversation because I was still snickering about it. I'm typing away and Aiden gets out of bed and comes out to ask us if he will have a car when Todd and I die. We told him he would. He gets really despondent looking and says, "But I don't know how to drive." We assure him he will by then and please go back to bed and stop thinking about death.

A few minutes later he comes out again all worried, because once Todd and I die, AND he and his brothers die, then who will feed and water the cats?? I tell him that cats don't live as long as people and that the cats will die long before the rest of us. Now go sleep on that! Haven't heard a peep since. I'm trying to be honest with him but at the same time, get the conversation over with. I didn't have the best answers, I know. Unfortunately this kid does not forget anything!! So I'm sure it will come up again!

6 comments:

Mom said...

OK-now I am LOL ing....what questions! I am glad they were TO YOU and not me! Thanks for the laugh to start my day

Kat said...

Awww. I know these conversations well. Ever since my dad died last year my boys have been talking about death a lot and how they don't want me to die. Poor little bloaks. I remember going through the same thing when I was that age. :(

Aunt Cindy said...

I can not stop laughing...seriously you wrote this so well it was like we are right there with you...I feel sorry for Aiden worrying about so much 'grown up stuff' but the Car thing put me over the top, then the Cat being water too...So funny the way their minds work. Hopefully he had all his questions answered and he can put it all to rest. And he can always hire Drew to cook for him when he grows up....

dianna said...

Good LAWD Kel!!!I'm dying laughing!!! Not at the serious stuff (because God knows Mal is FULL of those hard questions too)but the car??? I'm with Aunt Cindy...that did it for me!
Those little minds are clean slates getting filled up with info every day...it's so hard for them to make sense of it all!

Jan said...

Oh Kelly, you have your hands full. Thanks for the laugh.

Gina said...

This is just precious-their minds never stop working!